Saturday, February 4, 2012

IT Company Appraisal Ghost

I was messaging my friend when suddenly the below conversation happened.

(Ya, I know.. I can be extremely irritating...)



(No even I don't know.. how or why the few friends who I have tolerate me)






Glossary for Non-IT People:


Appraisal: After you work your Ass off through out the year. Someone somewhere decides how your performance was on completely imaginative and speculative criterion of judgement.
Depending upon the Outcome of this 'Appraisal' , Your Salary and Promotions are decided for the next year.



H2: Half-Yearly 2, This aforementioned 'Appraisal' happens twice a year. Hence H1 and H2


Appraisal Discussion: You meet with your Boss/Manager and pretend to go discuss how your fared on the 'Goals' which your manager would have set for you before.
You pretend to have achieved all of the Goals, and your manager pretends to have graded you awesomely well on the Grading Scale.



ODC: 'Off-Shore Development Center' (Fancy name for the office where IT people work)


Swiping the Card: To get inside this 'ODC' you need to have a Magical Card, which you swipe on another magic thingy, which then makes a beep and a big magic door opens. 
Err...Still too difficult to Imagine ?? Think of it as the Hi-Tech version of Alibaba and Chaalis Chor's "KHUL JA SIM SIM".


Band: At the end of your Appraisal. You are given a band between E and A. With E being the worst (but which I pretend stands for Excellent) and A being the best. (Which I consider stands for A$$ Hole).

I don't think I am going to shoot this short film, or as a matter of complete the story. So if you want to take this idea forward. Please feel free to do so.

THIS IS COSMIC BLASTING OFF !!!!!!!!

7 comments:

ahmedabadonnet said...

Wow...
ahmedabadonnet.com

anatreek said...

I didn't even need ur glossary..lol..best part is, not getting appraisal when he was alive and died before the discussion..:D..hahahaha

Pooja Abhay said...

I have a few questions Shrijeet:

Are you made to attend too many of "HR Disciplinary talks"??

Does your HR Manager read your blog posts??

Man...you are just too good at this. You should be punished for making people laugh so much :)

cosmic_wanderer said...

@ahmedabadonnet.com

Thanks for the err... Spam ?

cosmic_wanderer said...

@Ana_Treek ..

I know, you are Ek aur bechara(i) kaam ke bhoj ka maara(i)

:(

cosmic_wanderer said...

@Pooja,

Err,...What is it that you do again ? Scientist Thingy right ?

You are not secretly an HR in my company who is spying on me and at the end of the year going to present a report.. for my (Dun..Dun...Dun) APPRAISAL ?

P.S. No Luckily No HR from my company has come across my blog, Although I do send across the links of posts like these to my Boss.
(No.. Not Kidding)

Speak Ur Mind said...

Only the company names differ..but story goes same :-) True view on appraisal...

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